Posts Tagged ‘New Avengers’

Rating System:
**** : Excellent
*** : Good
** : Fair
* : Poor
Zero : Horseshit

Title: Power Girl #10
By: Jimmy Palmiotti, Justin Gray and Amanda Conner

Comics do not get more fun or much better than Power Girl. Lots of action, lots of humor and lots of great character moments. This book has not faltered once. But if it’s one thing that I learned from the last episode of Star Trek: TNG it’s that all good things…something, something. Really, just go buy this damn book already if you haven’t. The current creative team who have been with the book from the beginning will be leaving after issue #12 so enjoy it why it lasts. Can Power Girl haz an Eizner Pleez?

Rating: ****

Title: Secret Warriors #14
By: Jonathan Hickman and Sefano Caselli

I have been having some problems with this title as of late. For one, since Caselli’s return to art chores on this book he has changed up his style a bit and not for the better imo. The coloring isn’t helping any either. My biggest problem though comes in the form of the story. Hickman can usually do no wrong in my eyes but this last storyline has been taking forever to get anywhere. There have been too many flashbacks as of late that are focusing on way too many characters. Having it be SHIELD vs. HYDRA is one thing but when you also throw in LEVIATHAN it almost becomes too much for this title to handle. I’ll give credit to Hickman though. His Overall story is very ambitious but having this book only come out once a month is not going to cut it. If there was a way for this comic to come out biweekly during the summer (like Marvel Comics used to do with some titles) to help quicken up the pace of the story I think that would help out tremendously. Unfortunately that probably won’t happen. I’ll give this title a couple more issues to get something going before I decide whether or not to drop it.

Rating: **½

Title: Green Lantern #52
By: Geoff Johns and Doug Mahnke

This issue is basically Blackest Night #7.5. Lot of stuff thrown into this issue: The origins of Ion and Parallax are revealed, the rainbow lantern corps try to defend Coast City while attempting to take the planet Xanshi off the playing board and then you have the “rebirth” of Thaal Sinestro. One thing that hasn’t been doing it for me in these last few stories of Blackest Night is that Nekron is really turning out to be nothing special. He is the equivalent of Nero (from the latest Star Trek film) and I think we can all agree that that is not a good thing. Doug Mahnke continues to kill on art in this book and helps it gain an extra star rating.

Rating: ***

Title: Uncanny X-Men #522
By: Matt Fraction and Whilce Portacio

I haven’t read an issue of Uncanny since the whole Utopia storyline and I really have no idea what had been going on in this book lately (so I was kinda lost). All I DO know is that this issue marked the return of Kitty Pryde so I figured I would give it a go. Blerg…how can Matt Fraction write Iron Man so right while his writing on Uncanny is almost unbearable. This was a pretty tough book to get through and I didn’t even bother with the Phil Jimenez back up story since the combination of shitty art with craptastic writing would have surely done me in. But everyone rejoice! Magneto has brought back our precious Kitty Pryde and all is good…except for the writing…and the characterizations…and the art. This book gets one star alone for it NOT being drawn by Greg Land.

Rating: *½

Title: Thunderbolts #142
By: Jeff Parker and Wellinton Alves

Ah, time to cleanse the palette with a Jeff Parker comic. I must say that out of all of the Siege tie-ins I am enjoying this one the most. You have the T-Bolts breaking into the Asgardian’s weapon vault trying to get their hands on the Spear of Odin for Osborn. You then have the Mighty Avengers showing up to stop them. And then you have Amadeus Cho taking out Mr. X in brilliant fashion while you have the U.S. Agent kicking some major buttocks and out Captain America-ing Captain America. On top of all that the T-Bolts start getting their shit together and come off quite bad ass. This was every bit an awesome issue of Mighty Avengers as it was the Thunderbolts. What’s it going to take to get Jeff Parker on an Avengers book already? Get Bendis out of there. Oh and speaking of which…

Rating: ***

Title: New Avengers #63
By: Brian Bendis and Mike McKone

THE ONLY saving grace of this title has been Stuart Immonen’s art. You take that away and replace him with the boring, static art of Mike McKone and there is no longer a reason to torture yourself reading it. This issue’s “cool and witty” dialog is suicide inducing. Bendis is the master of writing pages upon pages of dialogue with little to no substance all the while not moving the story forward. This issue is a perfect example of “sideways” storytelling (much like Ultimate Wolverine vs. Hulk). The only thing worse than reading this comic would be reading CBR’s review for it (and other Bendis titles). Praising mediocrity seems to be their specialty.

Rating: ½*

Title: Nemesis #1
By: Mark Millar and Steve McNiven

What do you get when you mix an uninspiring idea with passable art while adding a story that seems to be written by a 15 year old sociopath? Well, you get a comic that makes Kick-Ass look like shit. Spoiler: Kick-Ass didn’t really need any help to look like shit…and neither did this comic.

Rating: Zero

This week’s question:

“Is anyone else tired of the New Avengers?”

Earlier this week it was announced that Marvel is relaunching New Avengers with a new #1 while having the same creative team still on the book. Really, what is the point of this (besides making a cash grab with a new #1)? It’s the same creative team (Bendis and Immonen) and it’s pretty much the same damn team members. Also, why have two Avengers books and not have two completely different teams?

Speaking of which, let’s take a look at the revealed team members so far:

Luke Cage: Who is also going to be a member of the Thunderbolts
Spider-Man: Who is also a member of the Avengers
Wolverine: Who is also a member of the Avengers, X-Men, X-Force and the Pet Avengers
The Thing: Who is also a member of the Fantastic Four
Jessica Jones: Is not currently on any other team but is a Bendis pet project

Four of these five team members are already on OTHER teams which makes the New Avengers completely derivative. I really don’t get it. We now not only get Bendis writing the main Avengers book (give it up already, dude) but we also have him continuing to write the most inept superhero team in existence.

My question is this: Where is Dan Slott in all of this? How does he not get an Avengers book while Bendis gets 2? His Mighty Avengers was the only good Avengers book (terrible art aside) to come out in years.

I don’t know…I was hoping that Marvel’s “Heroic Age” storyline would lead to something new but it just seems so far that they are force feeding the fans the same ol’ stale horseshit.

Am I alone in thinking this?

J.

Hey folks, Elliott here. As 2009 draws to a close, I wanted to take a moment to thank all of you for following us this year. It’s been a year of ups and downs, highs and lows, ins and out- you get my drift.

I say in all sincerity that I am incredibly grateful for the CCW*TV Nation. You guys and gals are the reason we do our silly little show. Jose and I will often say that we have some of the best viewers on ‘the interwebs.’ Everyone respects each other and the comment boards are relatively troll free.

That is not to say that we don’t always agree, and that things never get heated, but hey, families go through disagreements all the time. And that’s what I consider you all, part of my family.

The dream made real...

The most prestigious award in comics!

So before I get all mushy (too late!) I wanna close 2009 with a comment made by our own ‘Locusmortis‘ on the Golden Loeb Award post. It’s passionate, thoughtful and well-argued. I may not think he’s right on all points, but I think this exemplifies what the CCW Nation is, comic book fans who care about comics:

“Every award series needs a “Lifetime Acheivement Award” which I nominate the person who inspired the name of these awards, the esteemed Jeph Loeb who started from the low of Onslaught and Heroes Reborn then rose to the heights The Long Halloween and the Marvel “Colours” series (all done with Tim Sale….hmmmm) then proceeded to low after low after low culminating with Rulk and Ultimatum.

For the 2009 Golden Loeb I nominate Marvel Comics for the following reasons:

  1. Overpriced books – both the $3.99 for 22 story pages and the 3.99 and 4.99 “special issues” bulked out by unnecessary reprints and crappy added “matter”. There is a recession, did you not get that news Marvel??? If you want my money you better damn well give me good value for it.
  2. Rulk – An insult to Hulk fans, an insult to Greg Pak after the very good Planet Hulk series, an insult to fans of good comics.
  3. The death and humiliation of the Ultimate line of comics – horrible writing, overrated art, overpriced books, complete disarray in terms of direction.
  4. The X-books – back in the 80’s the Uncanny X-men was the best comic of that era, now Uncanny is a mess despite Fraction and hosts Greg Lands horrible art. Legacy is just boring boring boring and as for the other books?…who really cares?
  5. Brian BendisThe New Avengers are a disorganised mess, a loose collection of 70’s misfits plus a couple of marquee characters who sit around doing nothing but eat chinese food and watch tv for issue after issue except when they are having the crap kicked out of them. Then the Dark Avengers, a loose collection of arseholes who all talk in the same voice despite vast differences in age and experience plus Moonstone who suddenly becomes the team bike (always available for a ride), the Sentry who alternately rips peoples heads off or cowers in the corner like a pussy and Tommy Lee Jones who leads the team and convinces Barack obama and the public that he should be put in charge of a multi-billion dollar espionage agency despite being a known murderer and supervillian.
  6. Captain America: Reborn – What the fuck happened you Ed Brubaker? 50 issues of good Captain America stories then you decide to rush into bringing back Steve Rogers by replacing a $2.99 book with a $3.99 one for no good reason except for Marvel to pillage peoples wallets during a recession. The book then acquires an extra issue just so Bryan Hitch can draw more splash pages which he can sell on to collectors later. This means the series drags on and on and fucks with the timing of other books which then destroys ANY remaining suspense.

    Added to this is that Reborn is just so fucking BORING! It ends up being a recap of the previous 50 issues, so so unncessary and so symptomatic of a year where Marvel alienates many of its own fans.

  7. And then theres the doozy, Dark Reign – a year long fest of BORING fed by hordes of uninteresting, unnecessary, overpriced shitty mini-series like Dark Reign: Lethal Legion, Dark Reign: Zodiac, Dark Reign: Mister Negative.

Spinning out of the vastly unsatisfying mess of Secret Invasion we have an “event” (or non-event as it transpired” inflicted on the entire Marvel Universe which means that Norman Osborne appears in EVERY FUCKING COMIC for a year and the heroes of the Marvel Universe are shit on from a great height by Brian Bendis and his genius plan for this shitfest.”  – Locusmortis

And on that note: we close 2009.

See you all in 2010!

Elliott

Title: New Avengers #60
Writer: Brian Bendis
Art: Stuart Immonen and Wade von Grawbadger
Publisher: Marvel
Price: $3.99

The Gist: Luke Cage had a heart attack. Norman Osborn and Doctor Harrow make him better but not before they attach a homing beacon/bomb onto Luke’s heart. The New Avengers come and save Luke (just like Norman predicted…of course) and take him to an undisclosed location. While at this undisclosed location Dr. Strange with the help of Hank Pym take a Fantastic Voyage into Cage’s body to remove said homing beacon/bomb before Osborn can locate there whereabouts/blow them up.

The Good: Stuart Immonen’s art is amazing as always. I am sure he is making some nice cheddar by working on this book but his talents are completely wasted on this monthly. Nothing but talking heads with sporadic action is what a Bendis book consists of (and you‘re lucky if you ever get ANY action). Immonen should be working on comics like Fantastic Four, Agents of Atlas and Incredible Herc instead of continuously being tied to Bendis dreck.

The Bad: Well, it’s a Bendis book. Is that not enough?

Ok, fine. So, this issue is all about Strange and Pym trying to find the bomb inside of Cage while at the same time Norman and his Dark Avengers are following the homing beacon to where the New Avengers are hiding. That’s the whole story. The only way this story works is if the writer can build some tension throughout the book and I am quite sorry to say that Bendis fails at that (if he was even attempting to build tension, that is). To be fair, if I was a mindless Marvel fanboy who loved nothing more than licking the taint of the company (i.e. buying and enjoying Bendis books) and knew absolutely nothing about good writing, then I may in fact think this comic was wrought with tension…but luckily I am not. You know why, to me, there is absolutely no tension? Because I unfortunately have read too many Bendis comics in the last year and know that he loves having the chance to tease a confrontation between the New Avengers and Dark Avengers but never, ever delivers it to the Marvel Zombies so they can masturbate to it. Bendis’ writing on New Avengers is the comic book equivalent of blue balls.

The Ugly: I can’t get into exactly how Strange and Pym were successfully able to remove the bomb from Cage’s heart (I seriously can’t get into it. It was never explained in the book. It just sorta happened) but what I can tell you is that we do get to finally find out where this undisclosed location is as we watch it explode thanks to the bomb detonating (unfortunately, like I just mentioned, not while still inside Luke Cage T_T). It turns out that the New Avengers were hiding out is Norman Osborn’s summer home. Yes, you read that correctly, Norman Osborn’s fucking summer home.

Now, you may ask yourself: “ Wouldn’t Osborn have security measures in place to not allow intruders into a home of his?

You would think that, right? He’s the Green Goblin AND is now heading up HAMMER. Osborn probably has some dangerous, secret shit hidden in his place not to mention a pretty brutal porn stash I‘m sure. If there was any security in place it is never dealt with. And this isn’t just one lone intruder. By the end of the book there are at LEAST fourteen superheroes walking around in there. Kinda ridiculous but definitely a symptom of lazy ass writing.

And you may ask yourself: “So, why would the New Avengers hideout there?”

That is never explained. If I was a Bendis zealot fan I would probably defend him by saying that, in theory, that may be the last place Osborn would look for the New Avengers. And I would almost buy that if any of the characters in the book mentioned that is why they were there but none of them do. So that simplest of explanations is not why the New Avengers were there.

And you may tell yourself: “But there has to be a reason for this.”

For the Avengers to be is Norman’s home? Ya, there is a reason and here it is: It’s so Brian Bendis could have a punch line to a joke that is not even funny to begin with. That’s it. It was all so we could see Osborn’s crinkly angry face when he tells the Dark Avengers that it was his home that the Avengers were hiding in and then subsequently got blowed up by the bomb that he himself had put inside of Luke Cage.

And you may tell yourself: “So, that’s the reason? Fucking hell.”

Fucking hell indeed. In the story there was absolutely no need for the Avengers to be in there. None. Unless, and I think I may be onto something here, Bendis really thinks that all of these little meaningless moments are all a part of an overall “ brilliant chess game” between the New and Dark Avengers. Follow me here: Clint Barton goes to kill Osborn, Osborn counters by instead capturing Barton, Osborn finds out where the New Avengers Secret HQ is so he goes over there to destroy it, while Osborn is destroying it the New Avengers break Barton out of prison, Luke Cage has a heart attack so Osborn captures him and implants a bomb in him, the New Avengers attack a HAMMER compound half was across the country and when Osborn goes to check on that the rest of the New Avengers break Cage out, and etc, etc, etc. God damn, I almost just bored myself to fucking death explaining all of these “chess like” moves. In the end though it really doesn’t seem like this chess game scenario is being written by a genius comic writer but instead by someone who is a mediocre hack who truly believes that they are writing something genius.

The End

J.

Title: New Avengers Annual #3
Writer: Brian Bendis
Art: Mike Mayhew
Publisher: Marvel
Price: $4.99

It’s been a while since I did a real review on here and let’s be honest, most of my reviews consist of me ripping a book. Not that there haven’t been shitty comics coming out since my last review, because there have been, but something that I have noticed lately is that all those shitty comics (i.e. Hulk, New Avengers, Dark Avengers) have become so bland and boring that a review of said books just wouldn’t have been fun. Now you may think to yourself “So, are you going to review New Avengers Annual #3 because it WASN”T bland and boring?” and the answer to that is “No” because is really doesn’t get anymore bland and boring than this. The reasons why I have chosen to review this book are as follows:

A. I have a few problems with this issue (shocking, I know) which I will shortly get into.

B. I feel the need to get back into the groove of doing regular reviews on the blog.

C. I know how much (most of) you guys and gals love it when I review a Bendis book.

D. I know how much (some of) you guys like to piss and moan over the fact that I bash your
beloved Bendis and Loeb comics and that always brings a smile to my face. This last reason alone was incentive enough for me to do this review.

Before I get started here is the actual solicitation for this issue:

Barton is in custody and that leaves not only Barton’s life in severe jeopardy but all the New Avengers are at serious risk. So the ladies of the Avengers band together to do what they have to do in a double-sized blockbuster Avengers story with a startling new chapter in the life of Jessica Jones. Brought to you by Brian Michael Bendis and artist extraordinaire Mike Mayhew.

So, what were my problems with it? Well first I’ll tell you that my problems do extend past the writing and art. The fact that this comic even exists in this format as a tangible good in the industry is a problem. The fact that this issue was not anywhere close to being a double-sized issue, as the solicitation implies, is a problem. The fact that it was $4.99 is a problem. And the fact that Bendis needs to tell us that some, if not all, of the female Avengers are menstruating is a problem but we can discuss that another time. My problems with this book are plentiful but let’s take look at them one at a time:

Problem #1: You’re only getting half of the story.

If the New Avengers monthly was the only New Avengers comic you have been buying for the last few months but you decided to pick up the annual on a whim you may be a little lost as to where this issue begins. I know that sounds a bit ridiculous but would you like to know why you may be a little lost? Well, it’s because everything that happens in this issue is a follow-up to something that didn’t even happen in the New Avengers monthly. The beginning of this story took place in the Dark Reign The List: New Avengers One-Shot. So if you decided not to pay $3.99 for a one-shot with a standard 22 page story in it because you just wanted to stick with the monthly you’re kinda screwed. If you have only been reading the monthly then you would never know that Clint Barton was captured by HAMMER after trying to assassinate Norman Osborn and that’s right where this Annual picks up. Which leads me to…

Problem #2: Remember when Annuals were self-contained stories and 64 pages?

Because I sure as hell do. This issue was solicited as a “double-sized” issue. If that were the case it would have clocked in at 64 pages and not 48. 32 of those pages were art, 7 pages were the same preview for The Siege #1 which you got to read in both The Siege: The Cabal One-Shot and The Dark Avengers Annual #1 which shipped last week, and he rest of the pages were taken up by ads.

In my opinion the material found in The List one-shot and this annual should have in essence been one story and published as THE Annual. But instead Marvel splits it up into two separate one-shots and charges a total of $8.98 for them. I guess Marvel figured they couldn’t get nine bucks for a 64 page annual so they did the next best thing: they broke it into two parts and released those parts a couple of months apart so fanboys wouldn’t notice that it should have only been a one issue story. Charging $3.99 for the first part was a joke but charging $4.99 for this “annual” leads me to my next problem which is…

Problem #3: This comic is not even close to being worth $4.99.

I believe I mentioned at the beginning of this review that I found this issue bland and boring and boy did I ever. The solicitation for this issue made it sound like it was going to be action packed (I believe the term “blockbuster” was bandied around) and that the female Avengers were going to be in the spotlight kicking ass and taking names. Now, I know how Bendis likes to treat his female characters (if you don’t know click here for a quick summation) and as I read that solicitation I was thinking “Ya, right. I’d like to see that” but we did actually get to see that…for THREE fucking pages. And 2 of those pages were a double splash page. The Dark Avengers were in this book more than the female Avengers. Also those three pages contained 3 out of the 6 pages of action in this book.

So, ya, this was pretty much another talky talk issue but you would think that if it were a dialogue heavy issue that Marvel would try to get an artist on here who had a somewhat dynamic style to spice things up, right? Nope. Not even close. I’m sorry guys but Mike Mayhew’s art in this issue is about as dynamic as a still-life painting of a bowl of fruit. Why does Marvel continue to let this kind of art fill their comics (cough, cough…Greg Land…cough…Greg Horn…cough, cough…vomit)? Mike Mayhew may be a good artist (to some) but to me he is not a good comic book artist. Call me crazy but I think that dynamic comic book artists draw the best comic books. Most of these pages just seemed so static with absolutely nothing going on. The Avengers’ home was completely filled with bare or brick walls. All the characters in this comic looked like they were taken right out of Poser 6. I will admit though that the three pages in this issue which took place inside Clint Barton’s mind were decent and were easily the best art in this book.

Problem #4: So we’re not doing that anymore?

Since when did Venom stop taking meds to shrink him down to Spider-Man size when the Dark Avengers go out in public? Did Osborn just stop caring about keeping up the charade or did Bendis?

Problem #5: Too damn convenient.

During the story Osborn finally finds out where the New Avengers hideout is so he gathers his Dark Avengers to go blow the shit out of it (hopefully while the New Avengers are inside). But when he does in fact end up blowing the shit out of it the New Avengers are nowhere to be seen. It just so happens that at that exact moment the New Avengers are busting Barton out of his prison which takes all of three pages (as I said before). Unfortunately(?), dear reader, the New Avengers and Dark Avengers don’t fight, let alone see each other, once again. I’m going to go ahead and call bullshit on this. This horseshit “out” that Bendis gave himself is fucking lazy writing and nothing else.

How did the New Avengers know that Osborn would find out the location of their secret headquarters? Dunno. How did the N.A. know when Osborn wasn’t going to be guarding Barton himself? Dunno. How did the N.A. know Osborn WAS guarding Barton himself? Dunno How did the N.A. know that Osborn was going to bring all of the Dark Avengers to their secret headquarters (which they didn’t know that he knew about)? Dunno. Why DID Osborn bring ALL of the Dark Avengers with him? Dunno. When Osborn saw that all of the N.A. were not in the headquarters why didn’t he fucking hightail it back to where Barton was being held? Dunno. You see what I’m getting at here? Nothing is explained…at all. Everything happens the way it happens because Bendis needs it to and the reader is supposed to swallow the bullshit explanation (or lack there of) and be content with it. How did the Marvel editors think that this would be a satisfactory resolution?

Problem #6: Steve Rogers? WTF?

And another Marvel comic has an appearance of Steve Rogers while he has really yet to come back into the Marvel U proper because Marvel can’t get their books out on time. This now makes 3 books in just two weeks that he has appeared in.

So there you go. My New Avengers Annual #3 review. You probably were not surprised by anything I said but, hey, that just means you’re getting to know me better. Lucky you.

J.

Here’s the solicitation for New Avengers Annual #3:

WRITER: Brian Michael Bendis
ARTIST: Mike Mayhew
COVER: Mike Mayhew

Clint Barton is in custody and that leaves not only Barton’s life in severe jeopardy but all the New Avengers are at serious risk. So the ladies of the Avengers band together to do what they have to do in a double-sized blockbuster Avengers story with a startling new chapter in the life of Jessica Jones. Brought to you by Brian Michael Bendis and artist extraordinaire Mike Mayhew. Rated T

PRICE: 4.99

Is there anyone more qualified to tell this story? I think not. Fanboys love, and I mean LOVE, the way Bendis portrays females in his comics. Nobody has proven time and time again how much respect they have for women characters in comics more than Brian Michael Bendis.

Oh wait…

Unfortunately, I’m pretty certain Bendis will continue showing us exactly what he thinks of the female characters of the Marvel Universe in the most unacceptable of ways. If he should somehow be able to keep his fanboy fantasies out of the script for this issue it will still not make up for all of his past transgressions. I’m sure that it will just mean that his editors are just growing tired of his misogyny. But who am I kidding. Marvel’s editors have never had the audacity to tell Bendis what is and is not acceptable and I really don’t think they will be starting now. It seems that the “boys club” mentality will always reign supreme at Marvel and the industry is worse because of it.

J.

EXCLUSIVE PREVIEW: “New Avengers Annual” #3/CBR